On One Hand

October 2, 2004

wooooo asdfghjkl;’

Filed under: Uncategorized — ononehand @ 2:56 am

The world is spinning right now. I’m always such a lightweight if I’m drinking for two nights in a row. I’m more drunk than I was last night, I think. I know it’s unhealthy to be drinking two nights in a row, but mind you all that I don’t drink that often. I had a few shots worth of tequilla. I’ve come to expect much more from alcohol now that I’m more experienced with it. I can function better with alcohol in me than I used to be able to, so sometimes I don’t realize how drunk I am. But it makes music sound so good, so it’s worth it. And I love everyone when I’m drinking.

I made drunk pancakes at a friend’s house, which was fun. Chocolate chips and syurup mixed right in the just-add-water batter. That’s what I was popular for tonight. I didnt’ even burn them. It’s nice to do something productive while you’re loose and dizzy. A guy who was chilling with us asked me for a kiss. It was cute, but I had to say no, and gave him a hug instead.

I took an extra shot before I walked home so that I could keep the buzz going longer. I thought I would be able to use the drunkess to do something creative when I got home. I was thinking that the lack of inhibition would let subconscious thoughts come out and I could keep them on paper or on the computer and articulate them when I sober up later. In retrospect, I don’t see how being drunk is doing me any good now while I’m alone. The only thing it really does is make me want to have sex with everyything. I was hoping to come home and find someone I know online, but at 3:00 AM, everyone has gone to bed. Maybe I can do something creative sexually to form an experience that I can draw from later. I’m always doing crazy stuff like that, collecting experiences. Once when I was high I came home and experimented a little before it wore off, and it turned out pretty useful. Now that I don’t smoke pot anymore (three times high is enough) I use alcohol in its place. I don’t know what i would even do, but I can’t waste this drunk.

I have a crush on somebody. It would be fun to have a boyfriend right now, seeing as I’m at home alone and drunk. If I had a boyfriend, then I’d have something (read: someone) to do.


There are lots of typos in this entry I bet. I can tell there are typos and gramatically incorrect sentences. But I’m leaving them for now because it’s important for me to be able to look back at this later and see how stupid I am when I’m drunk. That helps put things in perspective. I feel like my full vocabulary is still here, but my ability to fit sentences together into paragraphs is inhibited. I’ll be able to analyze all that tomorrow. My only concern is people who are reading this journal for the first time, thinking i’m stupid. Not that I care that much. I would make it a private entry if I really cared. You all might not be able to tell what I’m saying, but I make perfect sense to me at least, for now. I don’t know if it will make sense to me later. You can comment on what you think of it if you want.

Good night everbody.



  1. I’ll give you this: you write much better than I do when drunk.

    Comment by not_a_freak — October 2, 2004 @ 9:57 am | Reply

  2. I had a crush on someone before tonight. It wasn’t anyone I saw tonight.

    Comment by ononehand — October 2, 2004 @ 12:35 pm | Reply

  3. I don’t think you made a single typo. Your intoxicated ass could kick my intoxicated ass anyday in a spelling bee.

    Mmm . . . those drunk pancakes sound excellent right about now.

    Your crush = boy from class who made “less-than-subtle” facial expressions at you? Or am I completely off?

    Haha, hope you had some crazy “experimentation” last night, whatever that may have entailed.


    Comment by bemusedguy — October 2, 2004 @ 2:11 pm | Reply

    • 1) Thanks

      2) Yeah… but two nights in a row on drunk pancakes makes you sick of carbohydrates. I could really use some scrambled eggs and tomato juice right now.

      3) Naw, it’s not him. I guess I’ve been having crushes on everybody lately.

      4) My “experimentation” turned out very boring. I wasn’t very much in the mood, wasn’t feeling creative, and at 4:00 AM no one answered the phone.

      Comment by ononehand — October 2, 2004 @ 2:17 pm | Reply

      • I guess I’ve been having crushes on everybody lately.
        I know the feeling.

        Comment by bemusedguy — October 2, 2004 @ 3:26 pm

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