On One Hand

April 28, 2006


Filed under: Uncategorized — ononehand @ 1:37 pm

I applied for a part-time job as minister for a campus UU/UCC religious group. I really, really care about the job. It will be a way for me to give back to a community that has been an anchor for me through some very hard times.

I want the job so that I will have an opportunity to write and do public outreach for a cause I consider very good, but also because I want to get in to heaven. Ministers of all kinds get into heaven for free since they plan most of the events there, and it’s very hard work to arrange for food and entertainment for billions of people for eternity. and on top the free entrance they each get three comp tickets. That way I can bring along some of my friends who aren’t already going.



  1. That is way too funny! Comp tickets? 😉 I do not believe I would want to plan events for eternity though. You are too cool!

    Comment by Anonymous — April 28, 2006 @ 9:37 pm | Reply

  2. Yay UUs!

    Comment by lancerboi — April 29, 2006 @ 6:38 am | Reply

  3. I love the “matter of fact” voice of this. It seems as if you wrote it after encountering some book that laid out some qualities of what eternity in heaven will be. Hahaha, this killed me.

    May I have one of your comp tickets. It is becoming questionable if I will get in to heaven considering some bad choices I have made….*cough*….murder….*cough*……trafficking of cheap mexican anti-coagelents for heart patients….*cough*….insurance fraud (2 G’s!).

    So how much do you want?

    Dependent on if you get the job of course.


    Comment by timberwolves — April 29, 2006 @ 5:51 pm | Reply

    • lol my comp tickets are not for sale but you can have one if everyone in my family gets in without a ticket. I’ll ask for extra comp tickets; they’re usually pretty good about that.

      Comment by ononehand — April 30, 2006 @ 8:07 pm | Reply

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