On One Hand

August 7, 2006

Filed under: Uncategorized — ononehand @ 11:31 am

This summer is the era of not following through. Guys are giving me their phone numbers without me even asking, but when I call they don’t pick up and don’t return. People are offering to start projects with me and then putting it off indefinitely. People are making plans and then disappearing.

What’s the solution? Keep flying through the numbers. I meet new people every day, so if only one in 20 actually turns out to be something, that’s still good odds.

This is karma for last summer, when I blew off more people than I can count. So I am not angry, or even frustrated. I am happy enough with myself since I’m gaining weight and looking good.

I gained 15-20 lbs since I started working out. Does it show? Sort of. When a girl says she loses 20 lbs, it’s always fucking obvious, because she looks like she’s 40% smaller. I gained 20 lbs and you can hardly tell, I guess because muscle is denser than fat and because I was so skinny to begin with. My old pants no longer fit because my thighs are a lot bigger, and most of my smaller t-shirts are really tight now. But I don’t see much difference, maybe because I look at myself every day and the change is gradual, maybe 1 1/2 pounds per week. My parents, on the other hand, are telling me I look bigger, and I’m getting a lot more tips at work.

At the rate things are going, I’ll be 160 by mid September, and that’s awesome. I’m about 153 right now, more than I’ve ever weighed in my life, and I’m just elated to be consistenly above 145 every time I weigh myself.

I met a guy the other day who is an insane combination of opposites. He’s around 6’3″, bearded and had long, curly black hair, with a middle-eastern appearence. He’s straight but pretty effeminate when he talks, and manic and giddy, never stopping for breath, so he’s a weird juxtaposition of extremely masculine and extremely feminine attributes. I thought he was fucking attractive, and I’ve never liked someone so randomly in a long time. It’s mostly his extremely genuine and considerate personality that got me, but he’s also intelligent and very good looking. The thing about him I wanted to know was how he gets in shape: he’s he’s extremely muscular, 200lbs and not an ounce of fat on his body, but told me he doesn’t work out at all – he just eats 18 eggs a day, plus stays active because he doesn’t stop moving. So I started eating fucking eggs. I can eat 4 at a time but anything more makes me sort of sick. I got these questions in while he was hugging me and lifting me over his head, which I suppose is what you can naturally expect when a 200 pound guy has a serious case of ADHD. So I’ll put ADHD on my agenda and maybe I’ll gain a few more pounds, as long as I eat enough.



  1. Fuck now I feel like a shit for not calling you. I will not make excuses. I am that asshole 😦 On a lighter note I think I found your number 😀

    Comment by matraxis — August 8, 2006 @ 12:54 am | Reply

    • I wasn’t even thinking of you when I wrote that, I had a couple other people in mind, but yes, I rest my case, there is something in the air this summer.

      No pressure. If you’re too busy or whatever, that’s fine, like I said I just move down the line. We will have time later.

      Comment by ononehand — August 8, 2006 @ 3:03 pm | Reply

  2. so you told me to leave you a message and so i did…i’m the guy who swipped you in at the rec.

    Comment by _whoknowswhen — August 18, 2006 @ 10:15 pm | Reply

    • Ah, sweet! Now I know what you meant by “the guy with the ass.” I haven’t been on livejournal much lately so I sort of forgot about everything. What’s up?

      Comment by ononehand — August 20, 2006 @ 10:46 pm | Reply

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